(2026-07)

I enjoy thrillers, either in books or movies.  I thought the title of this post would make for a good story.  I went to Google Maps to find out where it is, and it turns out there are a couple of Someday Isles in the world.  Where is Someday Isle?  Well, it’s not really a place.  It’s “someday I’ll” and is an indicative response of someone who is prone to procrastination.,

I’ve been thinking of writing about procrastination, but I kept putting it off.  I decided 2026 would be the year when I address my tendency to procrastinate.  Finally, here we are in October and look, I’m getting around to admitting and writing about my quest to eliminate procrastination. 

Writing that last sentence reminded me of something from very early in my career.  I remember a salesman giving me a round wooden coin that had the word “TUIT” printed on one side.  The person told me “Now you have a round tuit.  You can get on with what you’ve been postponing.”

I know, this is a corny way to start a post.  What can I say?

I remember procrastinating at an early age.  I would avoid doing my household chores and only relent to avoid punishment.  After leaving home to go to college, I found MANY other things to do that were more interesting than studying or schoolwork in general.  I told myself I studied better under pressure, cramming long and hard before any exam.  This approach impacted my grades and disproved my belief.

I went to college only five semesters before quitting to get married.  I got my first full-time job two days before my wedding.  I found my tendency to procrastinate followed me at work.  I got myself in hot water a couple of times and decided to improve my consistency.  I spent a lot of time studying time management, goal setting, and personal development to cure myself of procrastination.  On the outside, my success gave the appearance of a productive individual who wasn’t a procrastinator.  What I’ve come to grips with is that I’m a “functional procrastinator” who masks their problem.  I masked mine by procrastinating on little things and not so much on major projects.

This year, I’ve decided to take a deep dive on procrastination, and have adopted a big goal – to eliminate procrastination from my behavior.  I’ve done much studying and reading about this behavior and find out I’m not alone.

Did you know there’s a 12-step program for procrastinators?  Check out https://procrastinators-anonymous.org/ for more information.  Not only is Procrastinators Anonymous a legitimate recovery program, but the site is full of very interesting resources for the chronic procrastinator.  I found out that my tendency to cram in college and put off work on a big project or task because I thought I “worked better under stress” is one of the most common excuses for procrastination.  Who knew?

During my review of resources online and my recollection of my procrastination tendency, I’ve learned a few things:

• You can reduce and even eliminate your tendency to procrastination.  There is a wealth of resources on the Procrastinators Anonymous website for starters.  I found numerous other websites that also have resources to help.
• Taking the first step is essential.  As in all recovery programs, the first step is admitting you have a problem.  This doesn’t cure procrastination, but it will get you going down a path to mitigate, reduce, and eliminate procrastination.
• Accountability is helpful.  I believe just admitting an issue helps you increase your likelihood to deal well with the issue.  I’ve found accountability to be essential to dealing with many issues.

The past few months, I’ve been concentrating on my following through with tasks and commitments.  I find it rather pleasing to complete tasks.  Have I eliminated procrastination in my life?  No, but I have reduced it significantly.

How about you?  Have you struggled with procrastination?  Have you tried to eliminate it from your life?  If so, I’d love to hear how you approached it.

(2026-06)

Since this year (2026) has started, I’ve had a song in my head consistently.  The song is “Hello Old Friend,” by Eric Clapton.  Perhaps you know it.  If you don’t, check it out on your favorite music streaming service.  This song speaks to me.  I have always liked the chorus.  This year it is very special.  This year, I have my 50^th high school reunion in New Orleans.

I graduated from O. Perry Walker High School in New Orleans in 1976.  I attended only two and a half years at OPW, having moved to New Orleans from New Iberia in the middle of my sophomore year.   As a matter of fact, I moved on the average of once every three years for my 12 years of school.  Averages can be misleading.  I was enrolled in three different schools in three different states for ninth grade!

Despite this turmoil, I am particularly fond of graduating from Walker.  I have a few lifelong friends that I made in that short amount of time (one of whom I wrote about earlier in this post: https://mrhensonllc.com/you-did-what/).  I met my wife in high school at Walker, and I’m still married to her after almost 48 years.

Ces Guerra was one of my first friends in New Orleans.  He encouraged me and my wife Julie to host the Reunion Committee at our house in March of this year.  The old phrase “it takes a village” applies to putting together such a reunion.  This group has been impressive to watch.  I am looking forward to attending this fun event!

The closer we get to the reunion date (September 26), Eric Clapton’s song is on almost constant replay in my brain.  As I prepared to write this post, I looked up the lyrics and was stunned (but not totally surprised) to find out that the song was released in 1976.  Pretty cool!

Ever since that meeting in March, I’ve been on the fringe of the committee and have watched their amazing work come together.  I’ve also spent a great deal of time with Ces discussing the reunion and reminiscing about our friendship.  I reconnected with him after he published his first book in 2007.  I lived in California then and happened to be in Houston on a business trip, so I went to a release party Ces and his co-author hosted.  We’ve been connected more closely since that time.

I truly enjoyed my limited time at OPW.  It didn’t take long for me to have a close friend group.  My involvement in our church youth group supercharged the development of strong friendships.  Since graduating from OPW, I’ve run across a few classmates in different places.  This year, I’ve tried to reach out more often to family and friends.  Connection is so important, but especially as you age.

Our reunion is later this week.  I will keep the song in my head and might quote the chorus more than once in person!  “Hello old friend, it’s really good to see you once again!”

Is there some dear friend that you haven’t spoken to in a long time?  Reach out and connect with them.  You’ll be blessed!

(2026-05)

According to the website Worldmetrics, “public speaking fear is a widespread concern, ranking among people’s top three fears” (see https://worldmetrics.org/public-speaking-fear-statistics/).  I was particularly afraid of public speaking.  I could easily converse with 1-2 people but froze in front of a crowd.  I broke out in sweat, and it started as soon as I knew I would have to speak publicly.  I struggled with this for a few years until I decided to act.

Six years after being hired at Chevron, I became a supervisor.  The year was 1985 right after the Chevron-Gulf merger.  I was 27 years old and still resisted any public speaking.  As a new supervisor, I went through a “sheep dipping” with other first-time supervisors as well as new Gulf-heritage supervisors.  This was in a five-day training program called Supervisory Skills and Knowledge Program (SSKP).

The SSKP model was quite simple.  It was five full days that included modules of different subjects designed to increase a supervisor’s effectiveness.  A Human Resources Development Representative (HRDR) facilitated the session, with guest speakers leading the various modules.  At the end of my SSKP, our HRDR asked for volunteers to return as guest speakers.  I took the plunge into the deep end of my fear and volunteered.

As a guest speaker, I would get to “audit” my module once (watching the guest speaker lead the module).  After that, I would then lead the module through three separate SSKP sessions.

My first session was a bit awkward, but it accomplished what I desired (to be more comfortable with public speaking).  After my four-session commitment ended the HRDR asked me to come back and do a different topic.  He told me that the feedback from my sessions was very high.  I ended up being a guest speaker for every SSKP module except one – Human Resources.  The local HR manager insisted that his department should be the only ones leading that topic (I didn’t mind, it was my least favorite topic!).

As a module leader, I became so familiar with the content that it was easy implementing my learnings as a supervisor.  This enabled me to develop my supervisory skills quickly.  Another benefit was that I was able to build a large network of fellow supervisors, creating my own support network.

My SSKP experience is still a good memory.  It really helped me deal with my fear.  This was put to the test early.  The HRDR told me that I was ready to take on a special group of supervisors.  He referred to it as an “old fart program” (it was before political correctness was a thing).   I would be teaching a group of very experienced supervisors.  They were either new to the Chevron system (former Gulf supervisors) or for whatever reason had missed the SSKP in their career.  I survived that session as well.  Given that I was a young supervisor (both in age and time-in-job), there was a lot of discussion and push-back from the group.  I knew my material well and applied it in my role.  The interaction was also good for my self-esteem and didn’t hurt my career!

I later was sent to a presentations class at Chevron.  One of the things they did in this class was record a video of your presentation, play it for the entire class, and then have a joint discussion.  This taught me two things.  First, no matter how bad you think you did as a speaker, it’s not that bad on video!  Second, there is a great deal of empathy in the audience for struggling speakers.

I developed an ability to speak publicly with confidence from these early learning events.  I also learned a few key lessons:

• Jumping in the deep end sometimes works!  Until I committed to being a guest speaker at SSKP, I shrunk from speaking in public.  My fear of public speaking was dwarfed by my commitment.  I’ve also learned that the hardest part of overcoming fear is just starting.  That’s what jumping in does for you.
• Public speaking is an acquired skill.  I still get jitters when it comes to speaking in front of a large audience.  Sometimes, I choke.  I have a particularly hard time in emotionally charged events (emotional to me).  One of the worst recent occurrences happened when I gave a eulogy at my father’s funeral.  I have also learned to embrace my emotions publicly and am not so embarrassed as I grow older.
• Sometimes the best way to learn something fully is to teach it to others.  I find when I must speak on a subject, I really learn that subject.  Also I am transparent.  My value system prevents me from lecturing on subjects I don’t fully know or practice, at least without admitting my own deficiencies.  I find this also heightens my accountability.

Is there some fear that is preventing you from action?  Is there one simple step or commitment you can make to get started?   If you would like to discuss this with me, email me at mike@mrhensonllc.com and we’ll schedule an introductory 30-minute session to see if there is value I could add to you. 

(2026-04)

I got my first full-time job in December 1978.  It was a weird time in life for me.  I had just dropped out of college after five semesters and was going to be married on December 23.   Curious yet?  My first boss turned out to be one of the most impactful people I worked with at Chevron (probably THE most impactful).  The start was auspicious for both of us.

After finishing my last semester, I had a hard time finding a job and was getting desperate.  There wasn’t much of a market for a 20-year-old who had no degree or experience – who knew?  If it wasn’t for a former Sunday School teacher (Max Hedrick) who worked at Chevron and knew me, I wouldn’t have had a decent paying job.  He found out that I was to be married in a few weeks and was looking for a job.  He sent me to Empire, Louisiana to interview for an office clerk job at a pipeline terminal.

The person who interviewed me was a guy named Bob Robertson.  I didn’t know it at the time, but he had reason to be very skeptical about hiring me.  Bob used to work for my father-in-law and didn’t get along with him (the feeling was mutual, that’s another story).  I guess he needed someone badly, so he decided to take a chance on a college drop-out.  He hired me as a contract employee less than a week before my wedding.  I guess I proved to Bob that I could do the job, because four months later I was hired as a Chevron employee.

I started working for Bob at Chevron’s pipeline terminal in Empire, Louisiana.  We met in a parking lot beside the Mississippi River levee at 7:30 each day to take a crew boat across the river to the terminal.  In May of 1979, Bob and I were transferred to Chevron’s Algiers (a suburb of New Orleans) office.  I continued to work for Bob (even sharing an office with him) until he was transferred to Houston to work in Chevron’s trading group.  We kept in touch, phoning each other often.  Whenever Bob called me and I answered in the customary “Mike Henson,” Bob would always respond with “Who cares?”  I still laugh when I remember that response!

A few years later, Bob transferred back to New Orleans into a trading position supporting Chevron’s Gulf operations.  I was still in Chevron holding a position of Administrative Supervisor in our pipeline office.  I got feedback from my supervisor that while I was doing a great job, I was not qualified for any higher-level jobs in the group.  Bob was one of the first people I talked to.  He told me, “You’ve got to get out of there.  You need to be in Trading.”  He also told me they were trying to get an additional position in Trading reporting to him.  A few months later, the job was approved and Bob asked me to work for him again, so I did from 1988-1990 when I was promoted and moved to Houston.  Since I was still in the same group as Bob, we continued to speak often.

We worked in the trading organization until 1998 when Bob retired at age 55.   After four years in Houston and four in Walnut Creek, California, I was selected to replace Bob in the role and moved back to New Orleans.  Of the three people on the short list to replace Bob, two of us had worked for him in the past.  I remember Bob telling me he was happy to be replaced by someone he knew could do the job.  I was humbled.  I also set about planning Bob’s retirement party while I was training with him.  It was quite an honor to emcee the event, which was attended by many people Bob had mentored.  The Vice President of Trading even came for the event!

Throughout my career, I learned a lot from Bob and his example.  One of the first lessons I learned happened the day I signed my benefit applications.  He told me he planned to retire at age 55 and I could too if I maximized my savings contributions to Chevron’s retirement savings accounts.  He was right!  While I didn’t retire at age 55, I did retire comfortably thanks to his advice.  In addition to the personal benefit guidance he gave me, I learned the following lessons that I applied to my career:

• Sometimes, it’s easier to beg for forgiveness than it is to ask for permission.  Bob told me that he applied this strategy often and was successful as a result.  He shared that many leaders won’t make decisions in line with my ideas or timing.  This strategy compensates for that.  He also warned me not to try it often on him!
• “The School of Hard Knocks” provides an amazing practical education for people.  Bob was sensitive to the fact that he didn’t have a college degree.  One of the things Bob shared with me when I signed my benefit package was Chevron’s Educational Refund Plan.  He encouraged me to take advantage of it and supported me when I did.  I found that Bob’s life experience was much better than a lot of what I was taught in college.  His military career (US Air Force), particularly his Vietnam tour of duty, provided experience that can not be taught and must be experienced.  Bob applied his experience well!
• Hire people who are smarter than you.  Bob shared with me that he specifically looked for people who knew more than him.  He learned early in his career that a “pedigree” isn’t necessarily a good indicator of how smart people are.  He knew his limitations and hired people who were strong in his areas of improvement.  This is an amazing lesson that served me well in my Chevron career.
• A true leader leaves a legacy.  Bob was famous for selecting good people into the trading organization.  He left an amazing legacy at Chevron.  Many of the people he selected went higher in Chevron than Bob did.  I view this as the validation that he was natural at selecting high performing people. 

I view Bob as my mentor and friend.  He was instrumental in my development.  Because of this, I invited Bob and his wife Beth to my 35th service anniversary celebration.  My boss, Bob, and Beth were the only ones there besides my family.  It was truly an “all in the family” celebration.  Both Bob and Beth worked for my father-in-law, Jack Phillips.  We had many stories about both me and Jack.  It was not a boring work event as my wife, daughters, and niece got to hear stories about Jack.  I cherish the memory of that evening.

Bob Robertson is the finest example of the power of a mentor I’ve experienced.  I became a better person because of his influence in my life and career. Who is your favorite, most impactful mentor?  If you are mentoring someone, what kind of impact are you having on your mentee’s development?   If you would like to discuss how my coaching could help you improve your mentoring skills, email me at mike@mrhensonllc.com and we’ll schedule an introductory 30-minute session to see if there is value I could add to you. 

(2026-03)

I recently was forwarded an obituary from a friend.  The obituary was for a former boss, Peter McCrea (go to legacy.com and search for his name).  Seeing the picture on the obituary brought back many memories, all of them good.  I even smiled a lot as I recalled my time working directly for Peter.

Peter McCrea retired from Chevron in 2001, shortly after the Chevron-Texaco merger.  At the time, he was the VP of Chevron’s global lubricants and specialty products organization.  He was famous (some would say infamous) in Chevron.  He had quite a reputation of reorganizing units and bringing about a lot of change (and subsequent turmoil).

In 1994, Peter oversaw Chevron’s Supply & Distribution (trading) organization.  He led a reorganization of that unit.  I worked in the oil trading unit in Houston when the reorganization was done.  I was selected as the Training & Quality Consultant for the group and reported directly to Peter. 

I initially went into the role with a good bit of trepidation.  I had heard a lot about Peter, most of it was fear inspiring.  I spent over two years working directly for Peter and developed an excellent working relationship with him.  Despite his reputation, I enjoyed my time with him.  I came to respect and admire him as a leader, manager, boss, and human being.  Looking back, this time was quite a character builder for me.  I owe a lot to Peter and wish the time could have been longer.

Shortly after I was selected for the role, I had a discussion with my current supervisor (a direct report of Peter).  I shared with him my concern and unease of working for someone with this reputation, along with my concern over moving my family to the high-cost San Francisco Bay Area.  He assured me that I was the right person for the job and if I continued working at the high level I had been, my salary would increase.  He said he couldn’t guarantee a promotion or a good raise, the likelihood of that was all in my hands.  He then humbled me by saying “we put you in that job to shape and improve Peter as a leader.  I know you can do that.”

That conversation allowed me to have a degree of confidence in my approach with Peter.  I worked for him and his leadership team just as I had done in Houston.  About six months into the job, we had our office Christmas party (ah, the good old days).  I walked up to say hello to Peter and his wife.  Peter introduced me to his wife by saying “Willinda, this is Mike Henson.  He’s my conscience at work.”  I was floored!

His introduction was indicative of our relationship.  I had the freedom to speak to Peter very frankly about his style of leadership, and how he could be a better leader.  He listened to me and did in fact improve in many ways.  I had freedom that my colleagues did not.  They couldn’t get over their fear and his reputation.

I remember one town hall Peter posted in our headquarters office.  After his intro, Peter took a seat in a chair next to the podium.  A different leader was giving a presentation, and I was acting as the MC.  Peter leaned his chair back and put his foot on the podium to relax.  Unfortunately, when he did, he knocked some stuff off the podium.  Instantly, the room went completely silent (an awkward silence).  I jumped in and said, “pay no attention to the man behind the curtain.”  This eased the tension and awkwardness and the town hall wrapped up successfully.  Everyone laughed about it, including Peter!

Peter was a unique leader.  He was independently wealthy and didn’t need to work.  I remember attending a leadership team dinner at his winery (Stony Hill, find their website and look at the history tab at https://www.stonyhillvineyard.com/ ).  Check out this site for a great story that includes pictures of Peter:  https://www.palatepress.com/three-generations-and-63-years-later-not-much-has-changed-at-napas-stony-hill/.  One of the leadership team members told Peter they wouldn’t ever want to leave the winery and go into the office (it was beautiful and serene).  Peter replied that he enjoyed the mental stimulation that his Chevron job provided.

I learned a lot from Peter.  One thing I enjoyed (that had nothing to do with leadership) was watching what wine Peter ordered whenever I went out to eat with him.  I gained quite a knowledge of wine from him.  In addition to wine, I also learned the following from Peter:

• Act like you don’t need the job.  Because Peter was wealthy, he really didn’t need to work.  He wasn’t bogged down or concerned with corporate politics.  He did things because he sincerely thought they were the right things to do, regardless of the politics (and sometimes impact).  He enjoyed making business better. 
• Be aware of the impact you have as a leader.  One Friday was very tough for Peter.  In the morning, he got the result of an internal review of our quality improvement efforts.  The review wasn’t good.  That afternoon, Peter received his upward feedback.  That also wasn’t good.  I noticed before I left for the weekend that he seemed down.  He was quiet, so I asked him if everything was okay.  He responded he had a lot to think about and wished me a good weekend.  The next Monday, Peter sent an email to his leadership team telling us that he had shared the results of the review and feedback with his boss and hired a coach to improve his leadership.  We were quite surprised.  He followed through.  I admired that about him.
• There is never a better time to change an organization than when you know what needs to be changed.  I remember getting a call from Peter late one Friday afternoon.  He asked me to come the next day and facilitate a meeting.  He’d just been given the approval to merge the domestic and international trading units at Chevron.  He had leaders coming from Singapore, London, Houston, and the Bay Area.  He wanted me to facilitate this merging, and the reorganization of two units into one.  It was strictly confidential, which was why the meeting was scheduled for a Saturday.  There was no drastic reduction in staff, so the impact on people was minimal.  Peter kicked off the meeting, then left the room.  I facilitated the leaders in developing the new organization, and we presented our thoughts to Peter that afternoon.  He approved it and asked me to prepare the documents for him to submit on Monday.  It made for a long weekend but was an experience I’ll never forget.  I was humbled that he trusted me for this opportunity.
• Don’t be afraid to have fun.  Peter had an infectious smile and laugh.  He was truly a lot of fun to be around.  He took work seriously, but he didn’t hesitate to have fun.

I know Peter improved his leadership skills after he hired a coach.  I saw it in progress and experienced improvement.  I enjoy adding value to people in leadership roles.  If you would like to discuss how my coaching could help you improve your leadership skills, email me at mike@mrhensonllc.com and we’ll schedule an introductory 30-minute session to see if there is value I could add to you. 

(2026-02)

I’m a classic rock person.  My favorite rock group is The Who.  I have seen them in concert many times and believe Pete Townsend to be an incredible songwriter and guitarist.  One of my best-loved Who songs is “Eminence Front.”  It has an amazing intro!  This song is on my Running playlist on Spotify.  It has a good beat and cadence, which makes it easy to keep a good pace.

I can easily get lost in a good classic rock song.  For me, it’s more about the music than the lyrics.  I admit I have no clue about the lyrics to some of my revered songs.  The other day, I really listened to Eminence Front while running.  I thought I understood what Pete Townsend was singing about, so I did an internet search on its meaning.

The AI summary I got from a Duck Duck Go search said, “Eminence Front is a phrase that describes a false or deceptive façade of importance, superiority, or success, often used to mask insecurities, flaws, or a lack of genuine achievement.”  What does this have to do with leadership?  Well, I believe many leaders put up a false front.  As the song states, “it’s a put on.”

I can remember two clear missteps I had in my leadership journey.  The first was early in my career as a supervisor and the second was close to my retirement.

One unit I worked in as a non-exempt employee had a tradition of holding a dinner for the exempt employees whenever a visiting manager or executive came into town.  The handful of us non-exempt employees were never invited, called ourselves “The Peon Club” and went out to lunch in the form of passive-aggressive protest.  The first time one of these dinners was held after I got promoted to supervisor, I had the opportunity to express my belief that this dinner was wrong.  I didn’t speak up.  The next day, The Peon Club went to lunch without me.  I had changed – I thought they were the ones excluding me.

Later in my career, I exhibited Eminence Front Leadership (EFL).  Our manager, who was two salary grades higher than me, had a reserved parking spot in the company garage in downtown Houston.  He was nice and let me use it whenever he was out of town or on vacation.  During a downsizing, his job was downgraded and he retired.  I was selected to take this new lower rated manager position.  I arrogantly assumed I inherited his reserved parking spot, so I started using it.  I remember getting a call from the building manager telling me my car was about to get towed.  Just because I got his job didn’t mean I was at the level that warranted a reserved parking space.  This experience was humbling and a bit humiliating when my team found out!

I had many experiences with EFL managers, either reporting to them or working alongside them.  One executive in particular stands out.  This senior manager was very clearly appreciating the perks of their position.  They made sure they had the best office, flew first class, and took full advantage of the position – regardless of the appearance.  We had another senior manager who was not performing.  My boss requested that I discuss poor performance with this other senior manager (who was higher rated and had longer service than me).  I was astounded and refused to, stating I believed it was their responsibility as the supervisor of the under-performing senior manager.

There were other managers who put up a front to try and mask their ineffectiveness, bad people skills, or poor performance.  They were easy to spot, being more concerned with making their boss look good than managing effectively.  I referred to these managers as people “whose light only shines upward.”  I’m sure you’ve seen the Eminence Front leader in action before.

An insecure person can react poorly to their first position of authority.  The thrill of the control goes to their head.  This isn’t authentic leadership.

I see the following pitfalls of this type of leadership:

1. The Eminence Front leader doesn’t get all the information necessary to lead well.  By mistreating or poorly managing their subordinates, they close communication.  This results in uninformed decision making.
2. There is little or no growth in leadership skills.  With no feedback and adjustment to behavior, improvement doesn’t happen.
3. Eminence Front leadership doesn’t have integrity.  People will see through fakes easily.  As a result, they don’t willingly follow this type of leader.

How does a leader ensure that they don’t fall into this trap?  I see three simple but effective ways to avoid Eminence Front Leadership:

1. Acknowledge your limitations as a leader.  A lot of time, ineffective leaders try to hide their limitations.  This is futile.  People are wise.  If you think you’re hiding your limitations, you’re delusional.  Your people can clearly see your limitations in action.
2. Seek and act on feedback from all your employees.  By having an “open door” policy, you’ll be able to understand how you can improve as a leader.  When a leader acknowledges the feedback and works on it, they improve their integrity with the team.  As this happens, improvement in performance and effectiveness follows.
3. Ask for help and act on suggestions from good leaders.  Build and maintain a network of mentors and coaches who can help you improve your performance.  Select people who have a good track record of results, success, or performance.  Learn from them and apply the lessons to your leadership.

enjoy adding value to people in leadership roles.  If you would like to discuss how coaching could help you improve your leadership skills, email me at mike@mrhensonllc.com and we’ll schedule an introductory 30-minute session to see if there is value I could add to you. 

(2026-01)

Tell me, when you read the title of this post, did you think I was going to talk about diversity?  I hate to disappoint you but hope you’ll read it anyway.  First off, I believe the topic of diversity (or DEI as some in the media call it) has been well covered and is a hot topic that is adding to the current “division culture” happening in the U.S.  While there is much I could write about diversity, I’d rather talk about adversity.

Hard times are uniquely valuable for leadership development.  When a leader is forced out of familiar territory by adverse situations, comfort is stripped away and character is revealed.  It forces leaders to make decisions with limited information.  If a leader is self-aware, they will grow and develop.  They build resilience and empathy, which are qualities followers respect most.

I view adversity as one of the most important crucibles for developing character and leadership skills.  I’ve heard it said that “friends show their true colors in times of adversity.”  The same applies to leaders – leaders show their true colors in tough situations or challenges.

My leadership skills were honed by going through adversity.  I remember several times I was tested.  Each time I learned something that became valuable later in my leadership journey.  I came up with five lessons I learned.  They are:

1. Resilience is built, not born.  Leaders who persevere through setbacks gain emotional stamina and learn to bounce back faster.  I’ve read a few books lately that talk about the concept of brain elasticity.  It’s been proven that a person can “rewire” their brain to cope and deal in different ways.  One of the first examples from my career that built my resilience was when I had to let an employee go because of downsizing.  It was in 1986 and I was in my first supervisor position at age 25.  The person I had to let go was a single mother who was a good performer.  She worked hard in a role she knew nothing about and was let go due to the need to reduce headcount in our division by five people.  There were four employees who decided to retire, so my employee was the only involuntary reduction.  I had to give her the news and escort her from the premises.  This was extremely hard for me as I’m very empathetic.  I can still remember everything about that day – the memories are indelibly imprinted.  Fortunately, a fellow supervisor (older and more experienced than me) took me to lunch and let me grieve.  I learned there will be times when a leader is to set aside personal feelings in the “greater good” of the enterprise.  This helped me deal with the emotional trauma.  It was good I learned this early in my career, as I was faced with many more staff reductions throughout my career.
2. Adaptability is survival.  Tough times teach leaders that rigidity kills momentum – the best leaders learn to pivot with humility.  I remember taking a new role in a business unit that I didn’t know much about.  I entered the job gaining support from my supervisor to take the first 90 days getting the lay of the land.  I fully expected to make no significant changes until I better understood how to improve the business.  It was a good plan, but as Mike Tyson said, “everyone has a plan till they get punched in the mouth.”  At my first leadership team meeting, I was put on the spot by the interim leader.  It was on the last day, after nine plant managers had presented their performance reviews.  I was asked to share my vision for the team.  I wasn’t ready to change major directions for the group, but this was my “punch in the mouth.”  I shared my observation that each of the nine plant managers were comparing themselves to each other.  I understood that partially, as they were trying to make a good first impression on the new boss.  I stated my vision simply and cleanly – “one network, nine nodes.”  I explained that I no longer wanted performance reviews that pitted them against each other.  The competition is external, not internal.  It turned out that my pivot was well timed.  Within two months, we faced a supply chain crisis of epic proportions.  The spirit of competition had shifted to collaboration and cooperation.  The network of nine plants came together to react positively in a short amount of time.
3. Vulnerability inspires trust.  During this supply crisis, I found myself speaking to operators at every plant.  I used our vision to get them to look externally.  I told them that while I wasn’t a plant operations expert, I was an experienced incident commander.  I shared that I wouldn’t tell them how to improve their plant operations because they were the ones who knew them best.  Instead, I used my commercial and incident command experience to focus everyone on the crisis at hand in the marketplace.  Openly admitting my inexperience rallied them to achieve better performance and increased their trust in me and my leadership.
4. Vision matters most when things fall apart.  The supply chain crisis shortly got much worse when our largest plant in the region was knocked out of service when it took a direct hit from a hurricane.  The “One Network, Nine Nodes” vision prompted a rallying cry for the entire network to increase production to fill the void.  I witnessed collaboration between union and management that had not been seen before.
5. Empathy deepens through struggle.  I was normally well composed with employees.  The hardest time I had was after the hurricane hit our plant.  I spent a lot of time working to ensure all our employees were accounted for.  Many of them had to find an alternate place to live because their homes were damaged so badly.  My heart went out to them as they tried to recover.  As I visited our other plants, I shared stories of their colleagues’ struggles.  I watched as they showed determination to do what they could to pull up the slack in production.  It was heart-warming.

I’m writing this post at the end of 2025.  I usually spend the last couple of weeks reflecting on the year.  I’ve had a bit of adversity this year, as have many of my family and friends.  I’m learning to reframe setbacks as feedback.  I can see this helping me adapt.  I’ve also seen people face big challenges this year and are using it to increase their resilience.  These people are coming out of adversity stronger.  They are inspiring me to do the same.

Are you currently facing adversity as a leader?  Are you coming out of it a better leader?  Remember, adversity doesn’t just reveal who you are as a leader – it refines who you’re meant to become.

I help my coaching clients resolve their problems by coaching them through the identification of issues and barriers standing in the way of excellence.  If you would like to discuss how coaching could help, email me at mike@mrhensonllc.com and we’ll schedule an introductory 30-minute session to see if there is value I could add to you. 

(2025-3)

I’ve been doing a lot of reminiscing the past few weeks.  August 20 was a sad, reflective day for me.  Not only was it the birthday of my first nephew (who passed away too soon), but it was the one-year anniversary of my sister Laura’s death.  Laura was a special person to so many people.  She was more than a sister to me.

Since Laura died, I’ve gone through the five stages of grief (Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, and Acceptance).  I decided a post about what Laura taught me would honor her while helping me accept her passing. 

Laura was born in 1954.  She was the second of three children my parents raised.  She didn’t like being called the “middle child” and referred to herself as either the best child or the favorite child.  She was confidently consistent with these monikers (much to the chagrin of the other two of us).

Laura had a couple of quotes that have become family institutions.  The first was from her early childhood.  I believe she was in grade school when we gathered as a family in our small living room in Weatherford, OK.  She was showing off her gymnastics abilities and started by exclaiming “Clear the runway!”  She then did a cartwheel and gashed her knee on our coffee table.  It left a scar that never went away.  “Clear the runway!” became our family announcement whenever we wanted to warn of a risky thing, or just to make fun of Laura.

The first date I ever went on was actually Laura’s.  My dad made a joke of letting Laura go to the drive-in with a boy in Pampa, TX by telling her she could go if they took me with them.  Laura’s boyfriend agreed, so I was the “third wheel” on their date.

The first college dorm room I visited was Laura’s at West Texas State (now called West Texas A&M).  Laura had enrolled in summer school, and we (Mom, Dad, and me) went to visit her.  I was surprised at how small the dorm room was!  This aligned my expectations many years later when I went to LSU for my freshman year.

Laura and I shared a fear of heights.  In the late 90s we lived in the San Francisco Bay Area.  Laura and her husband Myron came to visit us.  We took them to the Golden Gate Bridge.  Laura and I stayed away from the edge as the rest of the family took in the view from the railing.  We went late in the day, and the sunset was magnificent.  As we walked back, the automatic gate started to close to lock access after dark.  Laura freaked out.  She didn’t realize that the gate was only locked to prevent entrance and was still unlocked for exit!  We’ve laughed about that many times.

The second iconic quote from Laura occurred when our extended family was going through our parents’ house after my father died.  We had all three siblings along with our respective families.  Most of my parents’ grandchildren and a few great-grandchildren were present.  Some of the grandchildren were admiring a piece of decorative china my parents brought back from their life in Greece.  They were all trying to decide what it was.  Laura stood with them and listened to them for a while before interjecting “It’s a bud vase, you idiots!”  This quote has caused us all to smile when we remember Laura.

Laura was a very generous person.  She became known for her annual crawfish boils and for taking in a few people who needed a place to stay until they got in a better life situation.  So many people showed up at her memorial service who viewed her as their second mother.

Laura taught me a lot.  Three lessons I‘ve incorporated into my life and career include:

• The unsung hero is truly a hero.  Laura never sought the glory or limelight.  She exuded humility and strength in her life.  Laura’s strong silent approach calmed everyone.  She was great at building others up without seeking anything in return.  When my wife and I bought our first house, we were stressed about the finances.  I remember talking to Laura over the phone about the process.  A few days later, a check from Laura came in the mail.  She helped us financially without any expectations of when we would pay her back.  She said we could pay it back when we had it and told us not to add interest.
• Everyone needs someone who can keep a secret.  Laura was excellent in this area, perhaps the best person I’ve known.  She was not a gossip.  She was a human lockbox.  I’m sure she was burdened with many issues and stories.  She never leaked information and never showed the burden.  Later in my career, I was in numerous positions where I had access to a lot of confidential data and information.  I used Laura as a role model in protecting that sensitive material.
• Leave a legacy of strength, humility, love, and generosity.  I’ve heard it said that people don’t care how much you know, but they know how much you care.  Laura cared about everyone in her circle of family and friends.  Her death has left a deep hole in many peoples’ lives.  It’s truly humbling when I think of the impact she had on so many people.
• Keep in touch with your family, friends, and colleagues.  My sister Laura was a true friend.  I miss talking to her or texting her to check in.  If there’s someone you’ve been thinking about, reach out to them.  They may need a touchpoint from someone who truly cares.

How have you handled grief?  Do you have an unsung hero who inspires you?  Have you applied family lessons to your professional life?  I welcome your thoughts.

I help my coaching clients deal with various problems by coaching them through tough issues affecting their life and work.  If you’re unsure whether my coaching can add value, reach out and schedule a free 30-minute conference call by emailing me at mike@mrhensonllc.com. 

(2025-2)

Recently I’ve spent some time thinking about coaching.  In 2010, I was certified as a John Maxwell speaker, coach, and trainer.  At the time, I was a bit bored in my job and wanted to make a change.  Shortly after being certified, my role changed into one that was challenging and fun for me.  I thought I’d put the Maxwell coaching on back burner while I focused on my new position.

While working, I utilized my Maxwell training, hosting mastermind groups for various employees.  My plan was to stay fresh and use my certification after I retired.  Retirement was an adjustment and I’ve only modestly utilized my coaching passion and skills.  My life has been very fulfilling and enjoyable, due primarily to enjoying four grandchildren (https://mrhensonllc.com/whats-in-a-name/).

The children are growing up and are demanding less of my time and energy, so I am refocusing on my coaching business.  This has involved a lot of introspection and study on the role of a coach.  According to the Cambridge Dictionary, a coach is “someone whose job is to teach people to improve at a sport, skill, or school subject.”  A coach adds value to people.

My favorite leadership author and speaker, John C. Maxwell, taught me the importance of adding value to others.  This teaching resonated with me.  I truly enjoy doing it.  I get a buzz out of watching people grow and improve.  It’s not a job for me, it’s a calling.  I’ve seen positive impact in others as a result of my actions.  I particularly enjoy coaching people and watching them excel.

My personal experience with coaches started early.  I remember two coaches in elementary school and junior high that impacted my growth and development.  My Pop Warner football coach was instrumental in developing self-confidence and dependability.  I can picture this coach, but I can’t recall his name.  I was the smallest person on my team and not particularly athletic, unlike my father who lettered in every sport in high school.  (Dad never verbalized disappointment, just continued to encourage and provide tips.  What a guy!)

I remember two impacts these early coaches had on my life:

• In practice one day, coach put me in as an offensive lineman.  The play called for the running back to run through my position.  When the ball was hiked, I blew my block to a much larger lineman across from me.  The running back was tackled for a loss.  Coach then told us to run the play again but told me to switch with the running back.  He then told the running back to purposely step aside.  I was hit hard by that defensive lineman and tackled for a loss.  Coach told me this was to let me know that other people would depend on me and I shouldn’t let them down.
• I had a great band director in school from 5^th to 8^th grade, Mr. DiCosimo.  His son Vincent was my best friend during these four years.  Vincent was an excellent musician.  We both played trombone, but I wasn’t particularly good.  As a result, I didn’t make the cut for the marching band.  Mr. DiCosimo made me his “assistant” doing all the less-desirable tasks that are necessary to support a marching band.  I learned from Mr. DiCosimo that I could add the most value to the band through applying my administrative skills.  This also taught me that every position on any team adds value to the team by fulfilling their duties well.

I also recall my first supervisory position at Chevron well.  I was humbled to be in it and strove to learn all I could about managing people.  I relied heavily on input and advice from others, especially my father.  I also read and studied all I could. 

My first Chevron training program as a young supervisor, Supervisory Skills and Knowledge Program (also known as SSKP).  It was a week-long program that included guest supervisors as teaching leaders.  I’ll share more about my SSKP experience in a different post.  I discovered that I really enjoy supervising employees.  I even like preparing for and conducting performance reviews!  This allowed me to develop my skills supervising and motivating employees.

I counted on many mentors and coaches in my Chevron life to both model and teach leadership and management skills to me.  One of my favorites was Bob Robertson, my very first supervisor.  He remained a coach and mentor throughout my career and was available to me after he retired.

Towards the end of my career, I had a unique experience.  I got to see former employees surpass me (one even became my boss before I retired).  True leaders aren’t threatened when this happens, they are humbled and pleased.  Coaches enjoy seeing growth and improvement.  It is what drives coaches to continue.

While reflecting on the role of coaches, mentors, and leaders, I learned the following lessons:

• A coach can help you identify and address your blind spots.  I learned and grew so much while listening and taking advice from the various coaches in my life.  I dealt with a matter of integrity early on in my career.  If it hadn’t been for the guidance of my first supervisor, I wouldn’t have addressed it or succeeded in my career.  (Yes, this is another teaser for a separate post!)
• Sometimes everyone just needs a relief valve.  There have been times when I needed my coach to just be there for me and listen.  The cathartic nature of verbalizing fears, challenges, or concerns is amazing.  Having someone to be there for you without giving advice or direction is necessary.  Sometimes a coach can guide simply by listening.
• Everyone needs a coach or coaches if they want to improve in their life or career.  Different situations require different coaches.  I wouldn’t hire a leadership coach to help me improve my golf swing.  I wouldn’t talk to a life coach to help me grow my business.  There are coaches that can address many different areas of life and career.

Have you had a good coach?  What did you learn from them?  How would you describe what an effective coach is or does?  I’d love to hear your thoughts and comments on this subject.

I help my coaching clients resolve their problems by coaching them through the identification of issues and barriers standing in the way of excellence.  If you would like to discuss how coaching could help, email me at mike@mrhensonllc.com and we’ll schedule an introductory 30-minute session to see if there is value I could add to you. 

(2025-1)

Early on in my 40-year career, I was aware of the power of job titles.  At Chevron, key words gave an indication into salary grade.  As I grew in my role as a leader, job titles became less important to me.  That’s probably a good thing, because I’ve had some crazy job titles.  The most Dilbert-like title was “Manager, Strategy Development and Opportunity Identification.”  One of my daughters asked, “What do you do, look around and point to something and say there’s an opportunity?”

My favorite job title, and its evolution, is the name my grandchildren call me.  Before I was blessed with my first grandchild in 2017, I decided that if or when I became a grandfather, I wanted them to call me Scoobs.  For the most part, that has remained.  It’s had a few different evolutions by four grandchildren since 2017.

I got the nickname Scoobs in London and Paris in 2001 as I was wrapping up my Executive MBA studies.  I took my family to London for a few weeks before my study week in Paris.  One morning while we were heading to the Tube to sightsee, I strode out at a faster pace than my wife and daughters.  I recall that I was mad for some reason that I don’t remember.  My wife called out to me, but I didn’t hear.  I was hell-bent on keeping some silly schedule.  At some point, all three of them were shouting at me, shouting “Dad,” “Mike,” and “Henson.”  I finally heard and turned around and said, “Why don’t you just call me stupid?”  My older daughter didn’t quite understand and turned to my other daughter and said, “Did he say call me Scooby?”  Eventually, I got over my anger and we all laughed at the story and new nickname.

Later in Paris, our family joined all the other EMBA family for a tour somewhere.  While on the bus, my daughters told the story to my classmates.  One of them started calling me Scoobs.  My nickname hasn’t changed since 2001.

Sixteen years later in 2017, my first grandchild was born and the family formally started calling me Scoobs in her presence.  When she started talking, she referred to me as “Dew.”  What we didn’t know at the time was that she was having trouble hearing.  After she had tubes put in her ears, she still called me “Dew.”  I didn’t mind, because I was smitten by her.  Actually, I’m smitten by all my grandchildren. 

My second grandchild, my first grandson, was born late in 2018.  Since he had an older cousin, he easily followed suit by calling me either Scoobs or Dew.  Dew was easy for him to start with, and he switched to Scoobs shortly after learning to talk.

The names Dew and Scoobs were interchangeable for the next 2-3 years.  When my third grandchild was born in 2021, he continued the evolution of my grandfather name.  He easily learned Dew but insisted on adding a strong “k” on the end of it.  I was known to him as “Dewk.”   A couple of times he called me “Dewkie.”  Of course, this gave the entire family a few laughs.

The name evolution has continued with my fourth grandchild, my third grandson who was born in 2022.  He could hear his sister and cousins calling me Scoobs, but somehow it came out “Gooch.”  Of course, I didn’t mind.

As I reflected on the various names my grandchildren have called me, I learned two key things:

• The calling matters, not the name.  I love being a grandfather.  My life has been indelibly changed and improved with these four little humans.  There was a time when it looked like we wouldn’t have grandchildren.  Now I’m blessed with four amazing children.  And yes, I gladly embrace my bias! 
• What matters is the relationship.  I have developed a different relationship with each of them.  I treasure my time with them all.  I’ve decided that I really don’t care what they call me if they love me and know I love them.

During my career, these same two lessons are applicable.  I rarely cared what my title was.  I felt a little self-conscious only when one of my direct reports called me Mr. Henson.  I preferred Mike.  I had one employee who insisted on calling me “boss man.”  I thought that was funny, so I didn’t mind.  Other than that, the important thing was knowing what my job was and how to develop my team into a high-performing unit.  I utilized the relationships I developed with my team members to create or add value for Chevron.

In looking back, I should have insisted on business cards without my title.  It would have prevented explaining weird or obtuse monikers!

How about you?  What are your thoughts on job titles?  Let me know what you think by commenting on this post.