(2023-9)

I recently saw a television commercial that caught my attention instantly.  It started off with a voice and a simple message on the screen – “THIS COUNTRY HAS NEVER BEEN SO DIVIDED.”  My mental reaction was to expect a political commercial, so I stopped what I was doing to pay attention.  It turned out to be a commercial for a licorice candy company (licorice.com).  After the attention-grabber, it asked a question – are you a licorice lover or hater?  Check out the commercial on YouTube (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sYnvfNgFEsg).

This commercial resonated with me because it was aligned with a theory I have that over the past few years there has been more division in society.  It doesn’t seem to be getting better.  Instead, I think it seems to be getting worse.  I am concerned about the societal impacts and the mental toll this seems to be taking on people.  What challenges does this give a leader?  What impact is it having on life?

In the U.S., division seems to spike around presidential elections.  I first noticed this in the run-up to the 2008 election.  The country seemed to be polarized between the Obama/Biden and McCain/Palin ticket.  A staggering amount of vitriol rose.  This seemed to die down until the run-up to the 2012 election.  Folks on both sides (red vs. blue, Republican vs. Democrat, etc.) argued with each other over the success of the first Obama/Biden term.  At work, there were two individuals who sat next to each other in an open office.  These two were opposites politically.  Their team leader knew this and would periodically insert a comment that would fire up a heated debate between the two.  I’m embarrassed to admit that that team leader was me.  I’m glad that these two individuals rose above their differences and respected each other as colleagues.

It really grew during the 2016 election cycle.  There seemed to be more vitriol between the Clinton and Trum camps.  On the U.S. Election Day in 2016, I was on a business trip to Panama.  The U.S. election was a hot topic there with locals and Europeans.  It had also been a hot topic in Brazil, where I’d been many times that year.  I was struck by how many people outside the U.S. had their eye on our election and by how polarizing the discussion got.  Even the day after, there were many people who were either overjoyed or deeply depressed.

I have noticed that this state of division or polarization has expanded beyond politics.  Religion is always a hotbed of division.  I see this becoming more intense lately.  Think back to the start of the COVID-19 pandemic.  There was disagreement over social distancing, masking, vaccines, etc.  In the U.S., there have been numerous demonstrations and riots over race, police violence, abortion rights and many others. 

In New Orleans, there have been three local topics that are very polarizing.  First, a few statues depicting Civil War officers were removed by the city government.  Second, there was a campaign to rename streets to remove any reference to Civil War personalities.  Third and most intense issue was the recent recall petition to remove the current mayor (Latoya Cantrell – see https://mrhensonllc.com/leadership-lessons-from-latoya/ for more detail).

I tested my theory and observation that this division and polarization has gotten worse.  I found quite a few published articles that validate that polarization seems to be an issue, at least in the U.S.A.  The opening paragraph of a 2020 Scientific American article entitled “Why Hatred and ‘Othering’ of Political Foes Has Spiked to Extreme Levels” really caught my attention.  It stated “In 1950 the American Political Science Association issued a report expressing concern that Americans exhibited an insufficient degree of political polarization. What a difference a new millennium makes. As we approach 2020’s Election Day, the U.S. political landscape has become a Grand Canyon separating blue and red Americans.”  I feel it’s only gotten worse since this article was published.  This article also stated that 1861 (leading up to the Civil War) exhibited probably the worst example of hatred and violence in the U.S.

I found other internet articles that talked about the rising level of division and polarization from sources such as Time magazine, Forbes, Psychology Today, Intelligent Management, and Beyond Philosophy.  If you are interested in any of these sources, please reach out to me via email at [email protected] and I can share links to the articles.

It can be tough for a leader to navigate through such division and controversy.  I have been in situations in the past where teams have been rather polarized.  I tried to neutralize the intensity of discussion and disagreement while respecting both sides of the topic.  Sometimes, the topic is clearly dogmatic and one side “wins” and should, due to policy, ethics, or morality.  Most often, that’s not the case.

Dissension, disagreement, and polarization can bring a great deal of turmoil to a team.  The website Beyond Philosophy posted an article entitled “10 Things to Do When Leading in Turmoil” which did a good job giving suggestions to leaders in times of turmoil.  The article can be found online at https://beyondphilosophy.com/10-things-to-do-when-leading-in-turmoil/ and the ten things are:

1. Be seen and seen often.
2. Embrace honesty.
3. Set out the plan.
4. Roll up your sleeves.
5. Situate yourself on the front lines.
6. Communicate regularly.
7. Encourage, don’t discourage.
8. Put your feelings to one side.
9. Stick to your principles.
10. Find your patience.

While the article addresses change in general, I found them excellent reminders for a leader to keep in mind when confronted with polarization.  I have seen people use the “us versus them” mentality to promote and provoke dissension and disagreement.  The leader should not let this mindset poison the team.  Visible, authentic leadership is needed during times of turmoil.

In times of polarization, the leader should be the one to pull the team together.  I didn’t do this during the 2012 election and now realize my actions were wrong.  What do you think?  Have you seen a leader deal well with polarizing situations?  If so, how did they handle it?  Are you facing a situation that needs harmony instead of discord?  Send me an email or comment on this post if you’d like to discuss it further.

(2023-8)

Do you think humility is a strong character trait?  If you hear that a person is a humble leader, do you assume the person is weak?  Is humility in a leader a good thing or a bad thing?

I have worked for humble leaders and self-important leaders.  I have also studied many leaders throughout history.  Notable leaders in history include Jesus Christ, Mahatma Ghandi, Benjamin Franklin, and George Washington.  These four had a strong sense of self-confidence.  I personally believe humility is a powerful character trait for a leader to have and it will increase the likelihood of success for a leader.  I also believe that a humble leader must have strong (but not overly so) self-confidence.

I read two books this year that have sparked my review of humility in leadership.  One of the books was on humility as a trait and the other talked about a particularly humble leader that is not well known.  The first book about humility was “The Power of a Humble Life” by Richard E. Simmons.  The author considers one of life’s greatest paradoxes – that strength is found in humility.  Read the book synopsis on Goodreads  (https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/38340752-the-power-of-a-humble-life).  I highly recommend this book! 

The second book was “Indianapolis:  The True Story of the Worst Disaster in U.S. Naval History and the Fifty-Year Fight to Exonerate an Innocent Man,” by Lynn Vincent and Sara Vladic.  I started reading this book because I’m a World War II history buff and heard it was good.  I knew about the sinking of the USS Indianapolis and wanted to read the latest book about the tragedy.  Read the book synopsis on Goodreads (https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/36373560-indianapolis).  The story of the sinking of the USS Indianapolis, late in the war by a Japanese submarine, has been the subject of many books.  This book also examines the leadership of the skipper, Captain Charles McVay III.  Captain McVay was one of the survivors and was unjustly court-martialed for the loss of the ship.  Most of the survivors fully supported Captain McVay and respected his style of leadership.  The fact that many of them worked tirelessly for fifty years to set the record straight speaks to their respect of Captain McVay.

I’ve had the privilege of working with and/or observing a few humble leaders.  The first one was my father.  I’ve already written about him a couple of times, so will refer you to one of my posts (https://mrhensonllc.com/leadership-lessons-from-dad/ ) for a start.

One of my favorite bosses and leaders was Thom Garrett.  Thom was the General Manager of trading at Chevron.  I worked with Thom for six years in various roles and then for a few years more until he retired.  Thom graduated from West Point and served as an 82^nd Airborne Ranger in Vietnam.  With that military background, I expected a tough, rigid leader.  He was anything but.  I learned so much from him, both as a leader and a man of faith.  He was always very open and approachable.  He inspired through example.  Thom lived the life of a humble leader.

I also worked for Dave O’Reilly before he became CEO of Chevron.  I first heard of Dave from someone who had worked with him for many years.  He referred to Dave as “the CIW” – CEO in Waiting. Dave O’Reilly was in the queue to become CEO of Chevron.  Later, I was asked by a different manager to give a presentation to Dave when he came to visit our group.  I worked up a draft one Sunday on a flipchart in my office.  I brought my youngest daughter Hannah with me.  She worked on an assignment while I worked on my presentation.  Hannah asked me for ideas for a cover design for her report, so I made a sketch on the corner of my flipchart.

The next day, I showed my boss the flipchart and got her approval.  She liked the presentation.  I told her I would clean it up and put it in a PowerPoint presentation for our meeting with Dave.  Her response was “leave it on the flipchart, it’s just Dave.”  When I gave my presentation Dave also liked it.  He asked only one question – what was the drawing in the corner?  I told him about Hannah’s report.  He said he liked that idea as well!  I was touched.

A few years later, Dave was named CEO of Chevron.  He continued the tradition of an annual town hall.  I lived in Houston and got to attend the town hall in person since Dave was visiting for the broadcast.  I approached Dave to say hello, and he surprised me.  He asked me if Hannah got a good grade on that report – he remembered!  He was a great CEO and a humble leader.

In addition to reflecting on my personal experience with humble leaders, I did a little internet research and found quite a tremendous amount of information validating the theory that humility is a characteristic of good leadership.  Some of the notable website articles included:

• Fast Company published an article entitled “Seven reasons humility is a highly desired leadership trait.”  This is a short read that shares some excellent points.  It can be found at https://www.fastcompany.com/90595756/7-reasons-humility-is-a-highly-desired-leadership-trait.  Check it out and see for yourself.
• BetterUp, a coaching resource, published a blog post entitled “Humility in leadership: The unsung skill of great leaders.”  This post (https://www.betterup.com/blog/humility-in-leadership) is a deeper dive in the topic of humility and how useful it is in leadership.
• The Law Enforcement Bulletin, a publication of the FBI’s Training Division, covered humility in one of their Leadership Spotlights.  This quick read (https://leb.fbi.gov/spotlights/leadership-spotlight-humility-a-leadership-trait-that-gets-results) was very targeted and on point (in my opinion).
• The U.S. Naval Institute’s Proceedings is an excellent resource.  It published an article by Sergeant Major Michael Burke, U.S. Marine Corps (Retired) entitled “Humility: A Leadership Trait.”  This article (https://www.usni.org/magazines/proceedings/2023/may/humility-leadership-trait) is another excellent article on humility in leaders.  I really liked the final sentence in this article – “Humility is the polish that will help a leader shine.”

One of my favorite Bible verses is Philippians 2:3, which says “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves.”  This verse summarizes my view of humility in leadership.  It is a key leadership trait.  Humility in leaders attracts followers – most people are willing to follow a humble, authentic leader.  The facades some leaders try aren’t real.  People see through them easily.

Do you agree with me that humility is a vital part of effective leadership?  I welcome your insight and thoughts on this.  If you’d like to discuss this topic, or any other leadership perspective, please email me at [email protected].

(2023-7)

While doing some research on this post, I stumbled upon the following quote: “Be careful what you ask for because you just might get it.”  This quote resonated with me as we have recently been working with contractors on maintenance and home improvement projects.  On some occasions we didn’t get what we asked for.  When we reflected on the issues, it became clear that I hadn’t specified clearly and concisely what we were hoping to achieve and how we wanted it to be done.

After the first issue, it reminded me of some training I had taken many years ago on Reinforcement Based Leadership (RBL).  It also caused me to do some research on construction specifications for small home improvement projects.  I found out that our experience wasn’t unique.  I had not followed a core principle of the training: pinpointed behavior is vital to achieving the right results.

I also saw this not only on our home projects, but in a major road construction project on our street in New Orleans.  In the span of almost three years, I had three different driveways.  The first one was our existing one.  This one was replaced by the second one.  The pouring of the concrete on the second driveway was completed during a small rainstorm.  This left us with an unattractive, spotty driveway.  It was functional but didn’t meet the specifications in the contract between the city and the contractor.  We were not alone.  The contractor had to replace at least six driveways!

Our experience was much less costly.  Our first big project was to replace our upstairs deck with a composite deck.  While this material is more expensive, it should withstand rain and sun exposure for a much longer time.  While the work was going on, I made my first mistake.  I didn’t really inspect the work fully until they were “completed.”  It wasn’t done correctly.  They had damaged the flashing, which caused leaks.  I spent significant time getting the contractor to correct the work and do it right.  There’s still a little bit that needs redoing.

I sat down with my wife and discussed the situation.  After looking back at what happened and why, we determined that not only had I not given clear, concise, and pinpointed instructions I hadn’t supervised the construction effectively.  Fortunately, we had several projects that required contractors, so I had the opportunity to improve.

For the next two projects (work on our fascia and turf replacement) I set clear expectations upfront.  I also watched over the projects more actively and provided feedback as they progressed.  Both projects went better.  We still haven’t got what we were hoping for.

I looked back on some of my RBL training materials to find ways to clearly lay out expectations and pinpoint behaviors for success.  I also checked in with one of two consultants that provided me with training – Aubrey Daniels International.  Their website has an excellent article (find it at https://www.aubreydaniels.com/media-center/organizational-solutions/articles/pinpointing-objectivity-and-achieving-alignment).  The website offers a pdf download of this article, which I highly recommend for leaders (and anyone in need of ways to be objective and specific to describe desired performance).

I also investigated construction projects and found that contractors also experience poor results from dialogs and contracts with clients.  ConstructConnect, a construction project software provider, published an online article entitled “5 Reasons Construction Projects Fail.”    Inadequate specifications and directions were referred to in a number of the five reasons.  (See https://www.constructconnect.com/blog/5-reasons-construction-projects-fail#about for the blog article.)

After my research and review of my recent experience, I’ve learned a lot about setting expectations.  The lessons I learned include:

• Learn from your mistakes.  I continue to be amazed at how simple this truth is.  It’s also incredibly powerful.  Our interactions with contractors continue to improve as a result.
• Clearly and specifically lay out your expectations before starting.  I’ve also found it helpful to discuss your expectations with at least one trusted person.  They can help you ensure that your expectations are indeed clear and specific.
• Align your expectations with all stakeholders.  It’s important to get everyone on the same page right from the start.
• If you want a contractor to clean up after the job is complete, make it a requirement at the start.  While this may seem obvious, it is a pet peeve of mine.  I’ve had to clean up after contractors in the past and I didn’t like it.  It’s the little things that can make a difference.

I am a firm believer in setting clear and specific expectations.  I also have experienced the benefits of pinpointing behavior to improve performance.  Despite my “head knowledge” in this area, it is not one of my strengths.  I struggle with this a lot.  It’s humbling to look back on my training and realize that I am not applying the knowledge.

How about you?  Have you had similar issues with contractors?  How did you handle it?

Do you have issues with employees not performing up to their potential?  Have you tried to pinpoint behavior and set clear expectations?  I would like to help.  I always learn something by helping others achieve their goals.

Let me know what you think.

(2023-6)

It’s been a year since my father passed away.  Late May brought about a seminal event in progressing through the grief of his death, the sale of his former home of almost 30 years, which occurred on May 31.  As I walked through the house for the last time, I couldn’t help but remember the Kansas song “Dust in the Wind” which is one of my favorites.  (Check out the lyrics at https://www.lyrics.com/lyric-lf/295741/Kansas/Dust+In+the+Wind – the music is haunting).

I did a complete walk-through of the house to ensure it was cleaned out and prepared for closing.  In less than 24 hours, the home that held memories was only a house.  By this stage, there were no reminders of my parents left.  I was stricken by the thought that we should cherish the memories we have of loved ones lost.  It’s not about the house, it’s about the memories.  There is now a new owner of that house, but there are still memories I will not forget.

Dad passed away on July 20, 2022.  We started going through his house on Labor Day weekend as family members were in town for his funeral.  We spent Labor Day weekend until May 30, 2023, going through the house dealing with the household items my parents had amassed in 92 years (almost 30 of them in the same house).  Sorting through this estate was a lengthy process.  When it was all over, there was an impressive set of statistics related to the belongings my parents left behind:

• We took ten loads of items to the local Salvation Army.  I think we stocked their showroom for a few years!
• We got a local junk removal person to pick up several times as the local community didn’t allow us to take it directly to the dump.  We called on this person on three separate occasions.
• Before the loads to Salvation Army, we dispersed belongings to at least nine households within the family.

When I showed up to finish the cleaning and prepare for the closing, I also picked up a few items that I had left for staging.  In addition, I left Dad’s tools locked in the shed.  When I got there, the shed was unlocked and some of the tools were missing.  In addition to being angry, I also couldn’t understand how this happened.  The shed was no longer locked.  I jumped to conclusions as to what could have happened.  This lasted less than an hour.  Once I calmed down, it dawned on me – it was just stuff.  I still have a good many of Dad’s tools, which give me joy whenever I use them.  I can replace the stolen tools.

I did a little research on grief while preparing this post.  I found the final walkthrough both therapeutic and sad.  In the end, the closure brought a contentment that I couldn’t explain.  I reviewed the Kubler-Ross model of the Five Stages of Grief (check out https://www.psycom.net/stages-of-grief for a simple explanation of this model).  Over the past year, I have progressed through these five stages.  Getting the last look at Dad’s house helped me accept his death.

After checking out the lyrics to “Dust in The Wind” I felt like that song didn’t fully express the wide range of emotions I’ve felt.  When I think of my dad, I remember the song “Daddy’s Hands” sung by Holly Dunn.  It’s a special song to me because my wife sang it at my grandfather’s funeral.  I reread the lyrics recently and see that they are applicable to my father as well.  I will always cherish our relationship.

Throughout the process of sorting through possessions and preparing to sell Dad’s house, I’ve learned a few lessons:

• It’s just stuff.  While some physical objects do provoke emotions, it’s memories that are important, not the objects.  I needed to let go of the stuff (this helped me quickly get over the theft of a few tools) and retain the memories.  I plan to do that.
• Integrate key possessions to strengthen memories.  I have a few items from both of my parents that cause me to think of them.  I use Dad’s Cross pen daily.  I have hung some of my parents’ artwork in my house.  I also carry a money clip from my maternal grandfather.  These things remind me of the impact my parents and grandparents have had on my life.
• Mom and Dad’s legacy has been dispersed to family and others.  Family members will think of my parents when they see the belongings they have integrated into their respective households.
• Don’t jump to conclusions.  I need to do a better job of reacting.  I saw that clearly after I reacted upon discovering the theft of tools.

I’ve come to realize that Dad’s empty house doesn’t matter nearly as much as the memories.  I plan to recall as many memories as possible and keep the memories alive.

Have you had similar experiences?  I’d love to hear about your experience and how you dealt with it.

(2023-5)

In the past couple of years, I have reinforced some of my thinking and beliefs about leadership by watching bad leaders in action.  Can one learn from poor examples as effectively as from good examples?  In other words, is learning what not to do as helpful as learning what to do?  I believe it is.

There are many examples of leaders who are out of touch and arrogant in their behavior.  This seems to be a trend that isn’t limited to business, it also affects civic leaders.  I’ve seen many examples of this lately.  My go-to person for bad leadership happens to be the current mayor of New Orleans, Latoya Cantrell.

Latoya Cantrell became mayor of New Orleans on May 7, 2018.  She is the first woman to hold this office in the 300-year history of New Orleans.  She became mayor after serving as a member of the New Orleans City Council from 2012-2018.  This length of service would normally be commendable.  If you do an internet search on Latoya Cantrell, you will find more articles concerning scandals than positive accomplishments.

Now that she’s in her second term as mayor, there have been numerous scandals and examples of bad leadership.  Even setting aside the politics of the scandals, the results speak clearly on their own.  Some of the outcomes from the Cantrell administration include:

• Crime has increased.  When you look at the period Latoya Cantrell has been involved in New Orleans city politics directly (from her time on the City Council through her time as mayor), crime has been on a steady rise (see https://www.city-data.com/crime/crime-New-Orleans-Louisiana.html for data up through 2020).  New Orleans became America’s murder capital in September 2022 when it recorded 52 homicides per 100,000 residents.
• Infrastructure issues are not being addressed.  If you do an internet search on ‘New Orleans Potholes’, you’ll find many stories documenting the deplorable state of the streets in New Orleans.  One story (check it out at https://www.fox8live.com/2022/03/10/pothole-repairs-take-over-200-days-complete-new-orleans-average-officials-report/ for the story) reports that it takes the city over six months to address potholes.  There’s even a page on the city’s website about potholes (https://nola.gov/next/public-works/topics/potholes/).  It’s ironic that the statistics for filling potholes stopped in 2016!
• Scandals and corruption involve the mayor frequently.  Since she’s been elected, there have been numerous scandals involving Cantrell.  They include:
  • Charging almost $30,000 in unlawful upgrades (flights and hotels)
  • Paying her “image consultant” $231,000 out of city funds
  • Living in a luxury apartment owned by the city without paying rent
  • Spending an inordinate amount of time with a member of her security detail (an affair was alleged in the divorce filing by the spouse of the security officer)

Because of these results, Cantrell faced a recall earlier this year.  The recall vote was unsuccessful, so Cantrell will serve out the rest of her term.

So, what can leaders learn from this example?  I have done a bit of reflecting on Cantrell’s leadership, and have come up with a few lessons:

1. Results speak for themselves.  It doesn’t matter what the leader says if their efforts don’t yield positive results.  Latoya Cantrell does defend the city, but with the data strongly against her, she comes across as disconnected from reality.  A leader needs to speak the truth and take responsibility for their results.
2. Don’t let your position go to your head.  Being a leader can bring temptations.  These temptations, when acted upon generate a sense of entitlement.  Latoya Cantrell justified her upgrades, “image consultant”, and luxury rent-free apartment based on her position.  In my opinion a humble leader is more effective and gathers willing followers.
3. Leaders serve their constituents, not the other way around.  This is a follow-on to letting your position go to your head.  A leader’s team will make or break the leader.  A servant leader gets good results because of their team.
4. As a leader, recognize you will be watched (even when you don’t expect it).  Public leaders have much less privacy than the average citizen.  All leaders must be aware that they will be watched with more scrutiny than the average person.
5. Don’t take offense or retribution for criticism.  Leaders will always be magnets for criticism.  As a leader, I tried to embrace criticism to evaluate my actions.  I acknowledge that the struggle is real.  I want to defend my actions.  In retrospect, there is usually a nugget of truth, a learning moment, or a validation to my strategy in all criticism.  A leader who responds in an even-handed manner will show not only poise but will show that they will listen to feedback.
6. There is a right way (and a wrong way) to behave in public.  During this past Mardi Gras, Latoya was photographed obscenely gesturing to a float rider.  This picture went viral and reflected very poorly on her.  A good leader wouldn’t respond in that manner or would take full responsibility for an inappropriate response.

As I researched Latoya Cantrell for this post, I found that I could quickly point out lessons I could apply to my leadership.  These lessons didn’t change my opinion of her leadership.  Instead, they reinforced my personal leadership style and beliefs.

How about you – do you think you can learn from other peoples’ mistakes or wrong (at least in your view) approaches?  Do you learn from poor examples as well as good examples?

Do you surround yourself with people who are willing to tell you hard truth about your own behavior?  I’ve also found that while hard truth sometimes hurts, I’m a better person for listening and accepting it in a non-defensive manner.

I’d be interested in your thoughts.  Do you learn more from positive examples or negative examples?  Do you have someone who will “tell it to you straight” when you make mistakes?

(2023-4)

I know what you’re thinking – this is a joke right?  Can Mike really be serious?  How can you possibly get leadership lessons from Mardi Gras? 

I love Mardi Gras in New Orleans.  If you’ve never been, what comes to mind when the term is used?  Is your idea centered on the wildness on Bourbon Street, which has been the topic of many shows and films?  For me, those films and stories don’t reflect what Mardi Gras means.

Mardi Gras this year was February 21.  It’s been over four months since the last Mardi Gras parade rolled in New Orleans.  The two weeks prior to February 21 were quite hectic.  Ten out of those fourteen days had at least one parade.

For me and my family, this two-week period is a time for gatherings.  Our place is quite close to the parade route in a part of the city that is tame compared to the French Quarter or Bourbon Street.  It is a natural place to gather and watch the parades.

If you have never been to a Mardi Gras parade, it’s not like any other.  There are similarities – bands, marching groups, and floats.  But these aren’t just any floats.  They are quite large and incredibly decorated.  Each float holds numerous riders.  They don’t just wave to the spectators, they throw trinkets.  The music is very different also.  There is music from the bands (much better than your typical halftime marching band music), the marching groups (there’s nothing like a Mardi Gras dance group), and sometimes from the floats themselves.  This makes a Mardi Gras parade much more interactive than typical holiday parades in the U.S.

My wife and I open our home and host family and friends for ten days, serving food for all who come.  Our family gathers at our house before the parades start.  We have food, drinks, and a lot of conversation.  This time is an extended family reunion for me, except everyone goes home to sleep in their own beds, gathering again for the next day of parades.

For the most part, my wife and I prepare food for folks who attend.  The last couple of years, others have offered to bring entire meals or food to supplement.  This has been quite helpful, as the preparation of so many meals is a big task.  My wife and I start planning the schedule and menus early in January.  We spend a lot of time reviewing what has worked and what hasn’t in the past years, which allows us to continually improve and freshen our menus.

Spending time with relatives helps to get to know extended family members well.  In a relaxed setting, people are more open.  This allows you to get to know them better and understand more about them. 

You might wonder what leadership lessons I’ve learned from Mardi Gras.  They are important ones:

1. Take time off for what’s truly important.  We started hosting at our house in 2016.  Before I retired, I usually took the two-week period off as vacation.  I learned the most important leadership lesson while I was working – a leader needs to make time for what matters most to them.  After my faith, family matters most for me.  I get recharged being around family.
2. There is a lot of value in teamwork and planning.  For the past seven years, my wife and I have spent a lot of time planning and preparing meals to entertain.  We’ve had a lot of stress and poor communication also (but we’re still married!).  I’ve learned the value of spending time with your team planning for an event or project.  We’ve been able to improve our communication and teamwork through the planning process.
3. Make sure you allow flexibility in your plan.  Once we’ve put together an entertainment plan for Mardi Gras, I tend to view it as locked in stone.  I’m learning that entertaining family is about having fun and enjoying each other.  It’s not about the plan.  Keep the goal in mind and realize that plans need to change sometimes.
4. Get to know your team members individually.  As a leader, knowing your team members allows you to serve and support them better.  Spend time with them in a casual setting.  Find out their goals, dreams, and interests.  You’ll be a better leader.  As my favorite author John C. Maxwell says – “People don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care.”
5. Don’t take yourself too seriously.  I can’t tell you how many stories come from our family gatherings at Mardi Gras.  I made sure to share most of these with my teammates.  I wanted them to know that while I take my work seriously, I don’t take myself seriously.  (Of course, my family would strongly disagree with that last sentence.)

I really enjoy Mardi Gras in New Orleans.  It’s a great time.  Spending time with family and friends makes it a wonderful season every year.  It allows me to disconnect from other stresses in my life.  Do you take time off for what’s important to you?  What is your favorite get-away?

What’s your biggest logistical challenge?  For me, it’s that two-week window where we’re hosting and entertaining.  I have found that a flexible plan and a great team yields success.  How do you address challenges like that?

Do you take yourself too seriously?  I know I have that tendency, especially at home or around my family.  I’m working on that.  Break out and try something different. Can you find leadership lessons in extraordinary situations or circumstances?  I’d like to hear your thoughts about the lessons I have learned from Mardi Gras.

(2023-3)

Now that I’m retired, I still find links to my career.  Sometimes this happens at an odd moment.  A recent event occurred around Game Six of the 2022 World Series.  My daughter sent the family a text that said that Jim McIngvale, a.k.a. “Mattress Mack” from Houston, would be throwing out the first ball of Game Six.  Mattress Mack is an icon of Houston.  He gained fame from his corny commercials about his furniture store (“Gallery Furniture SAVES YOU MONEY!”).  Early on, he dressed up for some commercials in a mattress costume (hence “Mattress Mack”).  When I got this text, I remembered many Mattress Mack stories, but most dear to me was a conversation I had with him in his store in the early ‘90s.  This got me thinking about Total Quality Management (TQM) which took American business and management by storm in the late ‘80s and ‘90s in the USA.

This text made me wonder what ever became of the TQM movement.  Some things don’t necessarily go away.  This is true for the systems and philosophies that yield results.  After the Astros won the World Series, I couldn’t stop thinking about Mattress Mack, TQM, and W. Edwards Deming.

Who was W. Edwards Deming?  He was the reason I met Jim McIngvale and held a conversation with him in his store with my family.

I became a student of TQM and QI (Quality Improvement) in the early ‘90s.  There were two big TQM “gurus” at the time – W. Edwards Deming and Philip Crosby.  Chevron was adopting TQM and gave their business units latitude to select the philosophy to follow.  My group picked the Deming philosophy.  I trained in this philosophy and even attended a four-day session with Dr. Deming in February of 1993.

My family lived in Houston between 1990-1994, so I was familiar with McIngvale’s Gallery Furniture.  One evening my wife and I took our two daughters to Gallery Furniture to shop.  Walking around the store, I noticed quite a few Deming quotes.  Mack was in the store, so I approached him to talk Deming and TQM.  He was all-in for Deming’s philosophy and was transforming his management style as a result.

Gallery Furniture experienced rapid growth in the ‘90s.  (For more information on Mack’s business sense, see https://www.businessinsider.com/mattress-mack-jim-mcingvale-net-worth-career-furniture-promotions-sports-bets?op=1#gallery-furnitures-sales-soared-during-its-first-year-of-business-as-americans-moved-to-houston-to-work-in-the-citys-booming-auto-oil-and-steel-industries-and-needed-to-purchase-furniture-for-their-new-homes-6 for a good recap.)  Mack has attributed the growth to his adoption of Deming’s philosophy.

[As a quick aside, I used my experience with Deming to contradict one of my MBA professors in 1999.  This professor, who shall remain unnamed, was talking about TQM and how he was good friends with Deming.  I blurted out in class “Deming’s dead!”  I told him that his “friend” had been dead for six years.  Not one of my finer moments!]

Jim McIngvale not only threw out the first ball of Game Six, but he also made news winning a record $75 million by betting $10 million on the Houston Astros to win the World Series.  He made this bet to hedge his promotion on sales of mattress sleep sets ( see https://www.cbssports.com/mlb/news/world-series-2022-jim-mattress-mack-mcingvale-wins-record-75m-betting-payout-as-astros-capture-title/ for the details).

While it was fun seeing the Astros win the World Series and remembering my Mattress Mack stories, I also got a chance to revisit my history with TQM after many years.  I still believe TQM works, especially if it is consistently applied.  Jim McIngvale used it to make a step-change in his business and has reaped the rewards.  He didn’t brag on his success, he just continued to serve his customers using TQM.  He is an excellent example of living a philosophy that works.

Living the TQM philosophy consistently and constantly is much better than “tooting your horn.”  Jim McIngvale didn’t apply for the Malcolm Baldridge National Quality Award (MBNQA).  The MBNQA was an attempt by the U.S. government to showcase companies who applied TQM.  Unfortunately, this award was more detrimental to the winners in the long run.  This isn’t only my opinion.  See the editorial “Time to kill the Malcolm Baldridge Award” from Design World magazine to find out what the Executive Editor of Design World had to say in early 2021 (see https://www.designworldonline.com/time-to-kill-the-malcolm-baldrige-award/ for the digital version).

It strikes me that almost every management fad ultimately fizzled.  Constancy of purpose and methods wins the day, if a spirit of continuous improvement is included.  What I learned from TQM substantially influenced my management style.

Did you experience TQM?  What was your experience with it?  Do you believe it was a management fad that disappeared? If you have a positive experience and integrated TQM philosophy into your leadership style, I’d love to connect with you and share stories.

(2023-2)

Last year I wrote a post entitled “No More New Year’s Resolutions!” (See https://mrhensonllc.com/no-more-new-years-resolutions/ for the full post).  As part of my 2022 goal review, I reread that post.  I thought to revisit it and share how I did without any New Year’s resolutions in 2022.

In mid-December I sat down and evaluated what happened in 2022.  I followed the standard four-step process of an “after action review.”  The four steps include:

1. What did I want to happen?
2. Acknowledge what really happened
3. What did I learn from the experience?
4. Adjust my behavior

I will follow these four steps in reporting what happened in 2022.

What did I want to happen?

The core of my plan at the start of 2022 was to achieve all my annual goals.  At the end of 2021, I developed ten key goals to drive my action in 2022.  I set achievable, actionable goals.  I set goals in all my key life areas.  I also set a mix of achievement vs. habit goals.

I also followed the lessons I learned from reading Michael Hyatt’s “Your Best Year Ever” book.  This was the book I read before developing my initial goals.

I was motivated and inspired to start the year – yet I didn’t achieve my ten goals.  When I looked back on the year, I knew it wasn’t my best year ever.  In fact, it was one of my worst for goal achievement.

Acknowledge what really happened.

I fully completed five of the ten goals I laid out for the year.  In looking back, it dawned on me that two life events took me “out of the game” for over three months of the year.  I’ve written about both events.  My three-week rafting trip down the Grand Canyon sidetracked me for five to six weeks (planning, preparing, rafting, and recovery).  My Dad’s health issues and resultant death put my plan on hold for quite some time.  I’m still trying to fully resolve Dad’s estate.

I didn’t plan for the unexpected (does anyone really?).  I have learned to give myself a little grace when setting goals.  I review my goals regularly and with the planner I use I re-write them quarterly.  I’ve decided to be more flexible this year.

I also set overly ambitious goals in 2022.  Setting ambitious goals is fine, but I learned I shouldn’t have set so many ambitious goals.

What did I learn from the experience?

I could tell heading into the fourth quarter of 2022 that it was going to be one of my worst years recently (as far as goal achievement).  I decided to begin my year-end review much earlier in 2022, starting the week after Thanksgiving.  I also started setting up my first quarter 2023 planner much earlier.  I decided to review earlier and look forward earlier.  I like how this is working so far.  I find I’m not beating myself up over missed goals like I have in the past.  Giving yourself grace is healthy.

I shared my 2022 goals only with my wife, which was one thing I learned earlier in the year.  This worked well.  I should probably expand the number of people a bit but plan to be judicious about who they are.

I also started setting my 2023 goals much earlier this year.  I completed my first draft on December 5, 2022.  I finalized this version on January 9, 2023.

I didn’t have any resolutions in 2022 and don’t plan to have any in 2023.  I will stick with my goal setting process with the tweaks I’ve instituted since my 2022 review.

Adjust my behavior.

A lot of my behavior adjustments were stated in the previous section.  To me, the biggest behavior changes have included:

• Earlier after-action review
• Earlier goal setting
• Scheduling routine goal reviews (I started a weekly review of goals in November of 2022.  I plan to continue that weekly review through 2023)

How did you do in 2022?  If you set resolutions, how did that turn out for you?  Have you decided to do anything differently in 2023?  Can I add value to your process?  Let me know, I’d like to help.

(2023-1)

As I mentioned in one of my earlier posts, I took a 21-day rafting trip down the Colorado River in the Grand Canyon last year.  This trip was truly a life-changing event and a special experience.  There are roughly only 22,000 people a year who raft down the Grand Canyon.

This trip was quite a step out of my comfort zone.  I had not camped out in decades.  My idea of roughing it is no TV!  I had three weeks to plan for this trip.  I was a last-minute addition to a trip a high school friend was arranging.  That preparation was well worth the experience on the water!  I learned a lot and observed a few important lessons in leadership and life.

Our noncommercial trip was made up of 16 people using six rafts.  The team leader was Tony, my friend since tenth grade in high school and a college roommate.  Out of the 16 people, I knew only Tony.  There were a handful of people in this group who had not rafted down the Grand Canyon, but I was the only one who had never been whitewater rafting!

I got sick on the second day, which caused Tony some concern.  Once you put into the river at Lees Ferry (outside Marble Canyon, AZ), the only way out is via a helicopter rescue.  My appearance troubled Tony and my boatmate Sarah so much that Tony seriously considered calling the Park Service to get me airlifted out of the park.  Tony and Sarah are both volunteer EMTs.  Additionally, there was another volunteer EMT and a paramedic.  On the second night, those four discussed my status.  The paramedic suggested we wait one more night before calling it in.  Fortunately for me, I woke up feeling myself again!  Turns out I had altitude sickness.  I am glad I wasn’t sent home.

The 21 days were remarkable.  The views of the Grand Canyon were amazing.  I would go to sleep at night thinking it can’t get any better than this.  It consistently got better for 21 days straight!  The skies were clear, which made the stars an incredible sight.

As a student of leadership, I watch for leadership lessons and can find them almost anywhere.  There were two key leadership lessons I observed on my trip:

1. Surround yourself with the right kind of people.  Tony was the trip leader on the permit.  As such, he was considered the “Responsible Party” by the National Park Service.  This was the third time Tony had rafted down the Grand Canyon (the previous two he was not the trip leader).  Tony was deliberate in selecting people to go on the trip (with one notable exception – me!).  He asked a friend of his (Bob) to go who had been down the Grand Canyon 8 or 9 times.  Tony designated Bob’s boat as the lead boat.  Additionally, he brought along the EMTs and paramedic I mentioned.  One of the EMTs (Katie) was going to become a full-time river guide after this trip.  Tony designated Katie as the safety leader.  Katie’s initial safety orientation was on point.  With the high caliber and experience of these key people, our trip was a success.  I find that leadership in any position is best served by taking this action.  Select people who know more than you do in order to compensate for your blind spots.  I learned this early on in my career and it served me well.  I’m glad Tony was secure enough in his position to follow those on the trip who were more knowledgeable than him.
2. Act promptly on issues as you see them arise.  For the most part, this 21-day trip was free of pettiness and bickering.  In any situation where you have 16 people this close together for so long, personalities are bound to clash.  Early in the trip, a minor conflict surfaced.  The affected parties never talked about the controversy, but there were many conversations around the campfire and on the boats.  The issue wasn’t addressed directly, and eventually broke the surface in a very visible, vocal way.  I learned once again that I should address the “elephant in the room” as soon as it’s noticed.  I was guilty of not bringing this up on the trip.  I’m trying to address issues more quickly.  It’s a work-in-progress for me.

In addition to leadership lessons, I also witnessed two life lessons:

1. True friends are a gem!  I have known Tony since I was 16.  In addition to being a friend in high school, Tony and I were roommates for a semester in college.  We shared a three-bedroom with another person we met the previous year.  The three of us guys were a good match.  At the end of the semester, I told the landlord that we were moving, and gave them the appropriate written notice.  I was the one who signed the lease.  A few months after leaving, I was served with a notice of a civil suit by the landlord.  Tony split the legal costs with me and met in person with our attorney.  Tony stayed with me through the end of this ordeal (we got the suit thrown out).  Over 45 years later, our friendship was strong enough to weather a 21-day rafting adventure.
2. There is a special bonding through shared experiences.  While I knew only Tony going into this trip, by the end I feel I have 14 new friends.  You do indeed bond through shared experiences.  I feel this bonding can be stronger if the experience is dangerous.  While a 21-day whitewater rafting trip may sound like a great time away from it all (and it is), there were quite a few close calls.

I continue to reflect on this trip.  It was truly life-changing.  I learned my physical limitations and vowed personally to do better about staying in shape.  Despite eating three big meals per day for 21 days (more than I am used to eating), I lost four pounds.  It was a strenuous time.

I am so glad I took this trip.  I would willingly do it again if given the opportunity.  How about you?  If you were given this type of opportunity (one that takes you way out of your comfort zone), would you take it?  What would you fear about doing something like this?

As a leader, is there something you need to do in order to step out of your comfort zone and stay relevant?

I’d love to hear your comments.  Let me know if you’d like to discuss personally.

(2022-15)

One thing I say often is “work is a four-letter word.”  While this is corny, it reflects my view about holding a job.  My career of over 40 years was mostly a means to an end – I went to work to provide for my family.  I enjoyed some of my jobs at Chevron more than others.  I tried to have fun at all of them though.  I believe that having fun at a place where I spend more than 40 hours per week is a necessity.  I also believe that when I am enjoying my work and the people I work with, I get better results.

How about you – do go to work solely to get a paycheck?  Is this the right approach?  Early this summer, I witnessed a few people who caused me to rethink my view of work.

During Dad’s health crisis (see my previous posts “Life Happens” and “Bittersweet Transitions”) I got to see quite a few healthcare professionals in action as they cared for my father.  The ones who stood out were the ones who treated him with dignity and respect.  They exhibited an inspired approach to their job, which manifested as sincere care for Dad.

One of the prime examples was Melissa, Dad’s hospice nurse at his assisted living facility.  Melissa was a relatively young nurse who showed a high degree of compassion, patience, and devotion.  One day, I asked her how long she had been a hospice nurse.  She then told me her story of going to nursing school to help people.  Her first role was ER nurse, which she did for a couple of years.  She got burned out and really did not like that job.  She switched to hospice nursing and told me she knew she had found her calling.  She seemed truly happy in her job and it showed in the way she treated Dad and his family members.  I quickly came to truly appreciate any healthcare professional who purposely chooses hospice care as their specialty.

I also got to see in action how leadership sets the tone in Dad’s assisted living facility.  The family (including Dad) selected Sunrise Senior Living in Frisco, Texas and are still convinced this was the absolute best place for Dad.  Tisha, their Executive Director, and I had a few conversations about the facility and the quality of the staff.  I asked her how she got such high-quality people.  She said she purposefully selected compassionate people to work there.  It showed!  Tisha set the tone for the entire organization.  There was not a person who did not live up to the facility’s mission – “To champion quality of life for all seniors.” 

Sunrise Frisco was a refreshing change from the small-town hospital where Dad was originally treated.  The staff there was in it only for a paycheck (except for one person – Dad’s physical therapist, who is a very compassionate person).  The difference between the two organizations was striking.

Another thing I noticed during this time is that compassionate leaders support their people in times of personal stress and difficulties.  My very first boss was amazing in this regard.  Very early in my Chevron career, my sister-in-law died in a car wreck.  My boss knew I was really close to her and told me I could take whatever time I needed to deal with things.  This was a tremendous relief to me and made me very devoted to this boss.

In contrast to this, one of my family members was treated poorly by their boss during Dad’s illness and death.  Their boss basically hounded them mercilessly, did not read emails that shared status, and was extremely self-centered.  It demoralized my family member.

How about you?  Are you in a job just for the paycheck, or are you pursuing your calling?  It is now my opinion that you should determine your passion and find a job that allows you to follow it.  Your passion will become a calling.  Mine is for coaching and developing people.  I got great positive reinforcement watching them grow based on my coaching.  It truly became a calling for me.

As a leader, what tone are you setting?  If you don’t know, ask your team members.  They will tell you.  If you are not setting the tone you want, take steps to change it.  This will take time, but the first step is recognizing where change needs to occur.

How do you treat your employees?  Do your employees work only for the paycheck, or are you helping them find their calling?  How do you support them when they are going through rough times?  Remember that your approach during difficult times can attract or repel good people.  Choose to attract! I would like to hear your comments, struggles, and experience.  Let me know if you would like to discuss this further and I will schedule a call or meeting.